Caution: Haiku May Lead to Drinking Beer With Friends

Gary Robson with beer
This is the author picture that used to run with my “Beer Snob” columns. That’s a Scottish Ale I’m tasting.

Oh, my goodness gracious! Yesterday, I posted 26 of my beer haiku on this blog. As usual, I posted a link on Facebook and Twitter. The Facebook link said:

Haiku: Celebrating Beer in Verse, in which I offer up 26 original poems to beer. Anyone care to add their own?

The response was marvelous, as a couple of my friends jumped in to respond, and we all ended up at Sam’s Taproom (the pub/tasting room attached to our local brewery, Red Lodge Ales).

Be careful, people! Writing beer haiku can lead to laughing, drinking, witty repartee, and hugs.

I’ve edited this only slightly to remove last names, fix the order of things, and take out a few extraneous comments. Other than that, this is what appeared on my Facebook timeline immediately after last night’s blog post:

Doug:
I really like beer
No, seriously, I do.

Gary:
Doug writes a haiku
But he stops after two lines

Doug:
BAH! In the comments section, you have to hit all kinds of Shift+Enter mumbo jumbo to make it format correctly!

Doug:
Beer, mead, beer, mead, beer
One is sweet, one is bitter
I like both just fine.

Doug:
Hoppy beer is fine
Malty beer is more my style
Scottish Ale, Porter

Doug:
Beer is good alone
Beer is better with great friends
Beer is always good

Doug:
Beer beer beer beer beer
Beer beer beer beer beer beer beer
I love this here beer

Dan:
Care for a pint sir? Indubitably, I would So, Ale or Lager?

Doug:
Dan has the same formatting problems I have.

Dan:
Stupid Facebooking
Writing a poem about beer
Can’t find the shift key

Doug:
Laughing at my pals
Dan, want to go get a beer?
Come pick my ass up.

Gary:
My Thanksgiving beer
Is all Montana-made beer
I love living here

Doug:
Gary, you in town?
Dan wants to go get a beer
Sam’s Taproom sounds good.

Gary:
Sam’s Taproom sounds great
I’d love to join you bozos
But I have some work

Dan:
Went to the TR
Eating some yummy chicken
pick you up real soon

Doug:
I think from now on
I will comment in Haiku
On everyone’s wall

Dan:
Excuse sacrilege
But oh my freaking christmas
Haiku can be fun

Gary:
It is easier
to make comments in Haiku
than to write Limericks

Gary:
Oh, who needs to work?
I will join you for a pint
Shall I pick you up?

Doug:
The first to arrive
With him shall I ride to Sam’s
and hoist a beer, CHEERS!

Gary:
I’m on my way now
If Dan gets there before me
Call and let me know.

Simon:
To craft an odd sort of verse,
One couldn’t think anything worse
Than fives, fives, and sevens,
about beer (good heavens!),
To me, seems downright perverse.

Adam:
I don’t understand.
What the hell is a haiku?
You people are nuts.

Jim:
God is good. Beer is great.
He gave us beer forsooth partake.
With his sun on hops doth shine.
Please back off, THIS beer is mine!

Jim:
I know…it’s a rhyme, not haiku. Gesundheit!

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